| Vaganza: | N. American TV western in which women played all the roles (See: Extravaganza). |
| Vasectomy: | removal of ones flower-holders (rather than ones flower removers). |
| Vegetarian: | tall, blonde, sharp as a potato. |
| Velocity: | Cowes. |
| Verb (v.t.): | [Ch. US] To turn a noun or adjective into a verb - eg. access, dialog(ue) ("The Yanks are always verbing their words, it really weirds our language."). |
| Verisimilitude: | quite like the letter D |
| Versions (np): | positive and negative pieces of poetry. |
| Via Appia: | Transylvanian expression of increased contentment. |
| Viable Organ: | suitable entrant for a church music contest. |
| Viagra: | a drug which works on the hard valve. |
| Vibration (n): | the maximum frequency of a hand-held vibrator. |
| Vicarage (thingy): | 1. here the chaplain keeps his automobile 2. a fiery sermon by the local parson 3. The Picture of Dorian Gray 4. where the hell is my vapour rub!?! |
| Vice versa (n): | a poet of tools. |
| Vindication: | act of hailing the wine waiter. |
| Vindscreen: | strangulated cry issuing from a tornado. |
| Viper: | it vipes the vindscreen. |